


The 7 Mistakes of Bokuto Koutarou

by phantomdieb



Series: Pizza AU [2]
Category: Haikyuu!!
Genre: Basically, Family, M/M, Other, a really happy family, akaashi voted for best dad, and kuroo, i cant believe i did this, i guess, laughter and fun and sunshine, relationships are only incidental, well except for bokuto
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-06-05
Updated: 2015-06-05
Packaged: 2018-04-03 01:29:17
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,641
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/4081291
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/phantomdieb/pseuds/phantomdieb
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Bokuto makes seven mistakes he regrets deeply.</p>
            </blockquote>





	The 7 Mistakes of Bokuto Koutarou

**Author's Note:**

  * For [kim_quim](https://archiveofourown.org/users/kim_quim/gifts).



> HAPPY BIRTHDAY KIM ♥  
> I wrote this just for you so enjoy it!  
> And also the biggest thank you to you for always talking to me about our AUs and encouraging me♥

Akaashi surely didn't expect to find them like this when he came home after work.  
  
  
But let's start from the beginning.  
  
  
Bokuto's first mistake was to trust Kuroo to look after Shouyou. He should've noticed, should've expected that something was going to happen when Shouyou came home and told him in that overly excited way of his about that one ninja movie he had watched together with Kuroo.  
But it wasn't until later, after it had already happened that Bokuto asked his son about all of this and he told him that it was his uncle Kuroo who had taught him about _all_ of his weaknesses. The betrayal he felt was enourmous and it took Kuroo a movie night in which Bokuto got to choose every single movie plus paying food including dessert to stop him from sulking.  
  
  
His second mistake was that he had trusted his son to be innocent and genuinely nice. If he hadn't he wouldn't have made the third mistake and just closed his eyes when Shouyou asked him to.  
  
“Sit down. Close your eyes and don't look until I tell you to, okay?”  
  
“Okay, okay. I promise.”  
  
And Bokuto Koutarou always kept his promises. Even when he felt Shouyou putting something around his hands and feet, he kept his eyes closed. He didn't get suspicious even the slightest.  
It didn't took Shouyou long, and that was Bokuto's fourth mistake. Underestimating how fast his son is.  
With his eyes still closed, he heard Shouyou leaving the room. Some time passed and Bokuto was about to maybe open his eyes just a tiny little bit. Of course only to see where his son went, when he heard him coming back. Shouyou climbed into his papa's lap and Bokuto smiled a little.  
  
“Can I open my e-”  
  
Bokuto almost choked when he felt _something_ being shoved into his mouth. He quickly opened his eyes and he saw the mischievous grin on his son's face when he climbed down from his lap.  
  
“I captured you!”, he screamed before he ran around him laughing. “EVIL NINJAAAAAAAS!”  
  
  
Bokuto tried to move, but thanks to him trusting Shouyou literally blindly earlier, he now couldn't move even the slightest due to his hands and feet being tied to the chair he was sitting on.  
A muffled sigh escaped him and with a disgusted impression he realized his fifth mistake: he should've done the laundry like Keiji had asked him to, because the sock in his mouth was clearly a dirty one.  
This was it. He would die and he didn't get to tell Keiji how much he loved him before or get to see Shouyou grow up to be a fine man. But it was his time to go now.  
Yet he still wished he got to tell Keiji- Keiji!  
Bokuto quickly looked up and turned to look on the clock. He should come home in about fifteen minutes. He would save him and Bokuto swore to himself that he would do the laundry for the next five, no, ten times after he got out of this. Without procrastinating of course because there was probably nothing more disgusting than a dirty sock in your mouth.  
  
  
Shouyou was still running around jumping on and off everything as if he was in a secret mission when he turned to look at his papa. He suddenly started to grin and Bokuto really didn't know if this was a good or a bad sign. So it was probably a bad one. The student watched his son running off somewhere and heard some noises.  
  
He was slightly afraid when he came back and his fears became reality when Shouyou grinned at him and told him: “I have to take care of my prisoner now. I have to torture you for information.”  
  
When Shouyou showed him what he was going to torture him with, Bokuto almost swallowed the sock in surprise. It was a can of whipped cream.  
  
“MRHMHHHMNG?”  
  
Shouyou grinned mischievous.  
  
“You're probably asking how I know about this weaknesses of yours.”  
  
Bokuto was a little surprised because he was right.  
  
“I had...uhm..” Shouyou looked a little lost at what to say when his face suddenly lit up again.  
“A little cat told me about it!”  
  
“MHRM?”  
  
Shouyou didn't answer him and just climbed into his lap again before he started to smear the whipped cream all over Bokuto's face and the latter realized that his sixth mistake was restocking the fridge with whipped cream and sweets just the day before. Clearly a mistake he regretted deeply.  
Shouyou looked at his face and seemed deeply in thoughts.  
  
“This is the opposite of a problem.”  
  
“MHRM?”  
  
“Uncle Kuroo told me that you love doing this with daddy and that it's one of your weaknesses but how is whipped cream on your face a weakness? I would love to have-”  
  
Shouyou stopped and looked at the can of whipped cream in his face and Bokuto looked at him in horror, shaking his head but of course Shouyou didn't listen to him.  
  
“I am an evil ninja! I can do what I want” were his last words before he closed his eyes and sprayed whipped cream all over his face. He started to laugh maniacally when he dropped the can and smeared the cream all over his face and licked it from his fingers.  
Bokuto prayed for Akaashi to come home finally, even if he was probably going kill him but he knew that if he was to die, he would take Kuroo down with him.  
  
  
While Bokuto still was trying not to suffocate on the dirty sock in his mouth, he finally heard the key in the door and he almost started to cry when he saw Akaashi entering the flat – and he froze and stared when he saw Bokuto before he turned to Shouyou who was running around and bouncing off the walls, his face still full with whipped cream.  
“Koutarou, what did you give him?”

“MRHMMGHRRMNN!!”

“Is that a SOCK in your mouth? Wait, is that MY sock?”

“MHHHHRM.”  
  
Keiji turned to Bokuto, away from Shouyou, who saw that as an invitation to capture him as well. So he silently crept up behind him before he jumped at his back.  
  
“DADDY! I GOT YOU!”  
  
He didn't think though that his daddy would know about that so Akaashi quickly turned around and caught him in his arms.  
  
“Hello to you, too. But may I ask what you're doing first? Why is papa like this?”  
  
“We were playing a game! Evil ninjas!”  
  
“And you're the evil ninja?”  
  
“Yes!”  
  
“Hmm, do you think that I can join you? I want to be an evil ninja, too!”  
  
Shouyou started to shriek in joy.  
“OF COURSE YOU CAN, DADDY!”  
  
He ran away but quickly came back with the now almost empty can of whipped cream in his hands.  
  
“Do you promise to serve me, the alpha evil ninja, no matter what?”  
  
“I promise.”  
  
“And do you promise to let our prisoner suffer?”  
  
Akaashi turned to grin at Bokuto.  
“I promise.”  
  
“With this I officially make you an evil ninja!”  
Shouyou carefully put some whipped cream over Akaashi's forehead.  
  
  
And with this Bokuto realized, that his seventh and biggest mistake was to think that Akaashi would be his hero.

 

–

 

It was a little later and at least Akaashi had been allowed by the alpha evil ninja to wipe the cream from their faces and switch the sock in his mouth with a clean one when Shouyou left because he had to go to the bathroom. Akaashi turned to Bokuto, a smug grin on his face. Bokuto's mind went blank when Akaashi placed himself on his lap so that they were facing each other before Akaashi leaned down, his lips just slightly brushing his ear when he whispered just how much he'd love to have him tied up like this in bed. Bokuto blushed, especially when he felt the tiny kiss Akaashi had pressed to his ear and he wanted to say something but thanks to the sock all he managed was a “MRGHHGNGHNNNHNG!”  
Akaashi grinned when he playfully touched the buttons of Bokuto's shirt

“Shhh, you can save those sounds for later.”

Before he got to react to that Akaashi quickly got up and a second later Shouyou came back into the room.  
  
“Hmm, Shouyou? Would you like to visit uncle Kuroo tonight and play evil ninja with him?”  
  
“YES! PLEASE!”  
  
  
Akaashi finally freed Bokuto and told him to take Shouyou to Kuroo.  
As a revenge he didn't call him beforehand or did anything else to tell him that they were coming.  
When they arrived, he just rang the door bell and when Kuroo opened the door, he didn't even greet him.  
  
“This is all your fault so you have to do this now.”

“What is my fault? Do what?”

“You'll look after Shouyou tonight. Oh, and if you ever tell him something like that again, I'll kill you.”

“Tell him what?”

“Uncle Kuroo, lets play evil ninja okay?”

Suddenly Kuroo understood what Bokuto was talking about and he started to grin, knowing what was going to happen the second Bokuto came back home.  
  
“Sure Shouyou, come in and take of your shoes.”  
  
“Alright!”  
  
“And Bro?”  
  
Bokuto raised an eyebrow and looked at him.  
  
“Have fun.”  
  
“I'm going to kill you.”

 

–

 

Kuroo turned around and went to look for Shouyou who somehow had disappeared in the short span of him talking to Bokuto and when he went into the kitchen, he found lots of candy wrappers.  
With horror he realized that this was Bokuto's way of getting revenge on him.  
And when he felt a kick in his back from a tiny evil ninja who had way too much sugar intus, Kuroo realized that his first mistake was trying to mess with Bokuto Koutarou.


End file.
